Valley Ranch or as it's known on the streets, the Cowboys' halfway house

The Dallas Cowboys singed 'Tank' Johnson - formerly of the Chicago Bears and numerous detention centers in the states - to a one-year, 1/4 million dollar contract. I'm an avid Cowboys' fan and defended the team and owner Jerry Jones when they signed T.O., granted he wasn't a legal gamble, just an overpaid toddler worth every bit of his temper-tantrum perdium, and actually wrote a column just after the signed-deal saying T.O. and the Cowboys were great fit for no other reason than the Dallas knack for taking in lost causes and either driving them to greatness or loading a semi-automatic in a book depository.
The Dallas defense is as exploited as Brittany Spears through the first two weeks of the season, but a jailhouse blitz isn't practiced in Dallas.
DUI, probation violations and suspect appearances just outside the body chalk of homicide crime scene - though American-esque in the way we all are desensitized by the 'if it bleeds, it leads' the local 6 p.m. newscast - wouldn't be items you'd find on the most respected job applicants, unless of course you're a former parole officer citing 'clients' you've worked back into the system while applying for a job as a security guard at the downtown mall.
If Tank cleans himself up, he could be the missing link in this already loaded Cowboys Super Bowl dream, if not, his signature might very well explode in the faces of Jerry Jones, Wade Phillips and every Dallas Cowboy fan renewed in the All-American persona this team has exemplified since Tony Romo became the face of not only the Cowboys and the SI/ESPN NFL, but also the face of "America's Team." Like the government's decision to gloss over what really happened to Pat Tillman in Afghanistan.